It's been awhile.

I am having some serious withdrawals from not posting 12 days!! I believe that's the longest I ever went!! Well I"M BACK!!! With lots of pictures of what went down in these past twelve days. Over these days Christmas happened!! Sad its over :( but it means I am that much closer to leaving for my cruise. Which I leave a week from tomorrow! Can you say excited??

I finally finished Jake's stocking about a week before Christmas! I loved the way it turned out for the most part. Plus I was so proud of myself for doing it. I know years to come when we have kids and all the homemade stocking are sitting there I am going to be so happy.

This is our Christmas card we sent out this year. Loved the way it turned out. So if you didn't receive one, I am sending it via Blogger :)

The Tuesday before Christmas my best friends from high school all came over to my house and we had dinner, games, and lots of laughs. It was much needed! We hadn't gotten together in months! It was great!

For Christmas Jake bought me a shellac kit along with colors. I got it two weeks before Christmas and it never made it under the tree for me to unwrap cause I have been using it at least twice a week!

After I started my period I was super bummed out. So I wanted to make myself happy, and Etsy arrived. haha I bought myself these beauties and I am so happy I did! I did put the necklace in my stocking as a stuffer so it worked out!

I put my chalkboard to use for a second time. I really wanted snow, and my wish was granted! :)

Luckily Christmas Eve Day I didn't have to work! We started the day off with Jake grabbing us some Mcdonald's breakfast. He even brought it up into our bed. We had a party that night with Jake's extended family. We got all cute and dressed up for it. After the party we came to our house with Jake's immediate family and opened gifts. We were very spoiled. After everyone left we opened Christmas Jammies. 

We woke up at 6 and drove over to my parents with all presents in tow to start our christmas bright and early. It's also my brothers last Christmas home before his mission. I was very spoiled this Christmas. Jake and I agreed since we were going on the cruise we would only spend $100 on each other. Well my shellac kit ended up being $110 and so I was for sure done. Than my sweet husband surprised me with these Nike's I had been drooling over. THAN he also gave me a brand new purse. I am such a lucky gal. My parents also gave the guys gift cards to Carraba's and bought us all our day pass to Atlantis. Then the sisters opened up a beach bag with flip flops in them! How fun! The last present of the day, was my sister giving my dad a collage of pictures that announced she was PREGNANT!! So my sister will be having grandbaby #10 in August. Exciting stuff.

Since Christmas eve on, the snow has poured over here in Lehi. And I am soaking up all of it! I am in pure heaven.

Well that's us the last two weeks! Christmas was excellent and now were just preparing for out cruise in one week! YAY

A literal Christmas {break}

Is it just me or are Sunday's like THE days to feel so emotional and so uplifted spiritually and mentally. I feel like I usually break down on Sunday's and start my goals for the week and how it will be better, on Sundays. Which is what I should be doing as a LDS member. Today, I was feeling lots of emotions.

I was injected with the HCG about 2 and a half weeks ago. Exactly a week later I was feeling nauseated every single morning. By day 5 of nausea I was feeling it 24/7 and I was sure that I was pregnant. But I felt doubtful cause I technically would only have been 3 weeks. Well it was Friday, and I was supposed to start my period that next day. I woke up feeling sicker than ever and didn't feel like eating but I was also starting to get a cold. Sucky! But I was sure that I was pregnant. Well that night like usual I started my period. I started to cry like usual. It just sucks sometimes. Jake was at work so I just text him and told him "I'm sorry, but I started my period" Like the great husband he is he told me, it didn't matter and that he loved me and I was his everything. I called my mom cause I just wanted someone to talk to. She instantly knew. This month wasn't as hard as it has been, in the past. But I was still distraught, emotional, and upset. Jake and I had decided 4 weeks before when we were starting our 3rd round of chlomid that if we weren't pregnant this month that we would take a break from trying so hard and just LIVE! This has been the hardest part for me this month. I slightly feel like I am giving up. Not a lot just a little. Like what if this would be the month. But I figure if my savior wanted it to happen it would. And I know WE NEED this break. I don't know how long it will be or what we will do when we come back but I know, it will be good for us in the end.

People ask me how I have been doing since Friday, and to be honest. Not great. But not the worse I have ever been. Today, I have cried about it the most. But I feel like I am giving myself this one last day, and this one last blog post about my infertility till we start trying again. Just one last time to let it out how sucky this is and how life is going for us. So no more emotional and annoying posts about what has consumed me for the past 18 months. I am so emotional right now, but I feel okay today. And spiritually fed. After this moment I am excited for what is to come for me. For my relationship with Jake. For our lives. And mostly for my relationship with my savior. Jake and I are literally making a list of all the things we want to do before we have kids. Life is funny the way it works sometimes. But I am grateful for the person I am becoming and the way my life is changing. I am grateful to know I have a husband, who is such a rock and loves me unconditionally. I am grateful for Jesus Christ who suffered for me, and knows EXACTLY what I am going through and loves me also unconditionally. I know my heavenly Father will grant all my righteous desires and has some amazing plan for us!

I am grateful for all of you who read these ridiculous posts! and have shown me so much love! I love you all!! Thanks for everything! Goodnight and AMEN!

A moment to brag...

I haven't had something really amazing happen in awhile and this to me was like almost as good as finding out  I was pregnant (not QUITE as good but just about). As we know I have struggled with school for the past 2 years with college. With figuring out nursing school. With grades. With tests. With just about everything!

But since I started school at SLCC my school life has taken a complete turn for the best! I loved school this semester and I excelled at all I could in every single class! So when finals came up of course I was slightly stressed but I felt pretty good about this semester. Well tonight when I went on to take my second and last final I decided to check my grades for my Nutrition class to see if he had posted my grade since I had taken the final last Thursday, this is what I found:

I just started crying. I was so overwhelmingly happy. I could not honestly believe that I got an A-. I didn't even think I could get an A at all! And my GPA hadn't been that high since high school. I just felt so so so proud of myself. 

That's all. I am amazing! Now I wait for my second grade :)

It's the Holiday Season

Which is why I am SO busy! Between finals, Bunco, and Christmas I have been going, going, going!

We celebrated two Birthdays in November. First we celebrated my nephew Hunters Birthday. Than a month later on December 1st he got baptized. It was weird to me that I have a nephew that I remember holding being baptized. But he look so stinkin cute in his suit!

Jake's Oma Frahm turned 80! So the entire extended Frahm family got together at her favorite Golden Corral to celebrate. She is such a feisty gal! I love her for it thought!

I have also been trying to carve off all the sugar I have been eating by exercising and eating better. My sister was so kind and loaned out her 30 day shred to us. It's killer, especially since I haven't worked out for a year or longer. I have somewhat enjoyed it though.

Unfortunately, I also started finals these past two weeks. So I was trying to study and some days I didn't make time for 30 day shred. And one night when I was studying extra long, my sweet hubbie brought me my favorite treat...what do you do? :)

As I have stated before I love love love to paint my nails, so of course my favorite holiday doesn't come without some festive nails. 

Than to add to the holiday stress I had Bunco at my house the same day as finals. But I was so excited to have it at my house for the Christmas Holiday! We started out at Chili's for dinner. Than we came back to my house for (if I do say so myself) the cutest hot chocolate bar! I was thrilled with how it turned out! We than did a gift exchange and I got comfy jammies. Than we played our favorite game of Bunco. I won hostess and got word blocks that said NOEL and an ornament. We stayed up till 3 talking and it was awesome!

Also, today we took our Christmas Card pictures. I was originally going to just take the photos from the pictures we took with my family but I ended up hating them all. But than last night my friend Amie asked if we would tag along and snap some pictures of her family with her nice Camera and she would take some of us! I was sold. It couldn't hurt. So we put on some clothes and they turned out pretty dang cute for how last minute we did it! Here is a sneak peak!

The two week wait

On Tuesday I went in for my ultrasound to determine how my follicles were and if they were functioning normally enough to burst and release an egg. I didn't realize at first thing was going to be a vaginal ultrasound but luckily that morning I text my friend who had to go through this and she confirmed my fears. As much as those people have seen my "whoo ha" I will never get over the invasion. Anyways... what their looking for is 1-2 follicles that are the size of 2 cm by the time you ovulate. I went in 3 days before I am technically supposed to ovulate and I had a few in there but I had 2 really good ones. They each were right on track with how they should measure and grow by the time I ovulate. So I was happy. I'm normal! It's funny/annoying cause every time I go in for an appointment and I am not pregnant, they always ask if my husbands been tested. And every time I tell them "Yes, he was normal." They respond with "well your just the perfect candidate for getting pregnant." Really? That's awesome! Then why isn't it happening? But honestly that does make me grateful, cause I don't have any major problems thus far. And I knew going into this that there was 40% chance its me, 40% its Jake, and a 20% there is no reason. I believe cause its god's will. Its just not easy giving in to it :)
So today, I went in and they injected into my stomach some good ol' HCG. The nurse than said "Now go home and have LOTS of sex for the next 24-48 hrs. But don't take a pregnancy test for the next two weeks or you will get a false positive." So its exciting that are chances are a little more increased this month!

As of right this moment, I feel pretty good. Compared to last 3 months I feel like I'm soaring! I have been trying not to think about it, or stress about it, and just go with the flow. Some moments its really hard not to. But after we started round 3 of chlomid, I decided I didn't think I could take much more of this medication. I started to think in my head that I wanted to take a little "trying to get pregnant vacation". I was nervous to tell Jake cause he is the one who wants to shoot for a baby by a certain age. But I brought up my thoughts to him and he completely agreed. I am sure this is taking a toll on him just as much as me! Poor guy! So after this month if our Eggo is not preggo we are taking a vacation. Literally and figuratively. I keep going back and forth with this decision but its like 80% a good idea and 20% I feel like I am giving up too soon. But with Christmas around the corner, a cruise, and just life in general I think it would be good! And who knows they say when you stop stressing it happens! But we will pick up the peices again in February or later. For now, we have a two week wait till Aunt Flo comes and gives us news!

Wait..Thanksgiving already happened?

This year for Thanksgiving I worked. LAME!! But I was okay with it at first cause that meant I wouldn't have to work any other holidays. So I accepted it. Plus I was excited with who I got to work with! But as the day got closer and closer I was sad I wasn't going to be home for Thanksgiving. I bought some delicious pies from Kneaders! I sent Jake with two and took one to work! They were definitely a hit.

That day I went in and I worked with my good friend Jenna, and than my friend Summer was a PCT. So I had good people all around me. The hospital was also nice enough to provide us with a Thanksgiving meal that was free. 

Finally my shift came to an end and I was STOKED to get home to my family and enjoy some Thanksgiving time with them. But I walked in the door later than expected and my mom and sisters were ready to go Black Friday shopping. I wasn't that hungry so I changed and we were off! Later on I was really bummed that I didn't enjoy my thanksgiving as much as I wanted. I kept telling Jake, I felt like I skipped over Thanksgiving this year :( I am pretty sad about it. 

Any who, one of my favorite things after Thanksgiving is Black Friday. I love to map out where were going, what deals were going to get and how far we will go to get them. Our stops were as follows: Old Navy, from 7 to 8, Walmart from 8-10:30, my moms house for a potty break till 11. Del Taco at 11:30 along with Maverick drink stop. Kohl's from midnight till 2. Charlotte Russe from 2-3. Express from 3-3:30. Del taco again. Dropping everyone off till 4:30. I hit my head on the pillow at 5 am. It may be crazy but I love it and it is so worth it! Luckily my hubbie let me sleep in till 12 pm the next day. ha