Our First week with Ashton

My first week as a MOM! I still feel weird saying that. It STILL has yet to set in that I am a mom to a beautiful baby boy! Who I love so much. I kinda feel like I a playing house and its all pretend and it will go away.

Any who... first week was a week ago Friday the 19 of April. I got him that morning from Mark and Les and they brought a suitcase full of stuff he would need. That was when I was like "ish just got real!" But I got really excited too cause my sister and I were going to lunch than she was going to help me register for my baby shower that is coming up! We went and the day was delightful. That night we had our friends Nate and Jimmy coming over for dinner and games. We got Ashton to sleep and than played games, but I felt so lame, I fell asleep on them I was so worn out from the day! haha welcome to being a mom right? Ah well!

The next morning we got up and dressed him in a cute little "coming home outfit" I about died and went to heaven. I love this guy! Did I mention that? I had to go to a friends wedding so Jake was left home alone with him for a couple hours. I was nervous, scared out of my mind, excited for Jake to experience him all by himself. He did great! Later that night we went out to dinner with my side of the family for a "Placement Party" it was great. Love the support of our families.

Sunday was day 3 with Ashton. It was our first time taking him to church. I was nervous about what people were going to say or do. But it was awesome everyone was extremely excited for us and kept saying how cool it was. I did have someone come up to me and say they thought my post on Facebook was a joke and didn't believe me till we had him in church. haha too funny.

Monday, oh Monday's!! This was my last shift I had to work before I went on Maternity leave. I was so sad  that Ashton left the night before so he could wake up with grandma and go to the babysitters one last time. But I went and paid my dues. It wasn't too bad. Plus Jake started off my birthday week by taking me to Tucano's and bringing me flowers. 

Tuesday, I went into school for the last time and took my final. I passed go me! I felt so blessed, to be done with school, done with work and become a full time mom to my little boy for 12 weeks. I decided that since we didn't have much going on I would take that time by painting his nursery. The theme is baseball and that's exactly what I painted. I LOVE IT! Turned out so stinking cute!

More pics to come of finished Nursery

Wednesday was shopping day!! We had errands to run and it was interesting and fun to take Ashton with me. We were in the dressing rooms at one point and he thought the boy he saw in the mirror was pretty cute so he gave him a kiss! I'm a little obsessed with him. That night we also had a BBQ with Jake's family.

Thursday was my B-day! (Post to come about that) Ashton was my buddy and I loved walking in to his room and see his grin just light up! I was such a happy momma! We went to lunch and my brothers baseball game. It was awesome.

Friday (yesterday) I wanna call my "mom moment" day. The day before Ashton had taken really crappy naps and was slightly ornery all day. Than yesterday started out the same way but worse  double time worse.  We went out to breakfast and came home and he started crying hysterically. I tried all my options: bottle- no, rocking-no, put in crib and let cry-no, playing-no. Basically I was streached thin. I was also exausted and had pulled a muscle in my back. So just all my patience was running low. And I was going to lose it. So I finally just had had it. I grabbed all the baby crap, ashton, my crap, and shoved us all in the car and just started driving. He finally fell asleep and I started sobbing. I called Jake and told him how Ashton didn't deserve the kind of mom who had low patience and was getting frustrated. It wasn't fair of me to adopt him when I am like this and I felt inadequate as a mom. But Jake assured me I did all I could and I was a great mom. I than met up with my sister and she also assured me that I did fine and that every mom feels this way. You just take it one day at a time. After leaving my running for another hour he finally woke up from a two hour nap and gave me the biggest grin and I fell in love all over again. I remember thinking "Dammit this is hard, but you make is SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO WORTH IT!!" 

I love being a mom. I love what I have been doing every day. I love this little boy so much. He is now my entire world. I love him so much. I am so happy Jake and I found him and made the decision we did. He is our everything now, and we couldn't be happier. Life is absolutely blissful.